Price: £1.60
Added: 20th April 2005

That's Sexy, Handsome, Attentive, Guy.
Unfortunately most men are BASTARDS?

?That's Bad At Sex Terrible At Relationships Drunken Shits!

Have a great birthday!

Comes with FREE badge - with photo - Men's brains are in their pants? Good job they're only soft in the head!

Price: £1.60
Added: 20th April 2005

9 inch - Oh shit 0 Pain

Full colour printed badge with photo comes FREE with this card, Men's brains are in their pants? good job they're only soft in the head!

Price: £1.60
Added: 20th April 2005

And does your mouth go dry as well?

Comes with a free badge to sum up the perfect man? He adds his lips to yours, takes away your clothes, divides your legs, gives you multiple orgasms!

Price: £1.60
Added: 20th April 2005

?When you have to issue a Flood Warning to your knickers!

Comes with a free badge to sum up the perfect man? He adds his lips to yours, takes away your clothes, divides your legs, gives you multiple orgasms!

Price: £1.60
Added: 20th April 2005

Inside her knickers this babe has a twenty inch fanny!

It's not a record, but it'll take some licking!

Have a Happy Birthday!

Comes with a free badge printed with boobs, and stating Beer is like tits! Men like more than they can handle!

Price: £1.60
Added: 20th April 2005

?Which is why I've enclosed this tissue!
Have a Happy Birthday!
(Inside the card is a piece of tissue)

Comes with a free badge printed with boobs, and stating Beer is like tits? Men like more than they can handle!

Price: £1.60
Added: 20th April 2005

? Because when she found out how old you are she pissed herself laughing!

Comes with a free boys night out badge, printed with Face down on the pub carpet? That's the closest I'll get to a shag tonight!

Price: £1.60
Added: 20th April 2005

Birthday Boy Warning? This babe is a cock teaser!

You've got a little dick? Ner-ner-ner-ner-ner!

Comes with a free boys night out badge, printed with Face down on the pub carpet? That's the closest I'll get to a shag tonight!

Price: £1.60
Added: 20th April 2005

Comes with free badge - I'm no ornithologist, but I do like a cockatoo!

Price: £1.60
Added: 20th April 2005

What have the perfect pussy and someone who never buys birthday presents got in common?

?They're both tight twats!
Hope you have a Happy Birthday anyway!

Comes with a boys night out card, printed with photo and Pussies Are Like Kebabs, you only want one whem you're pissed

Price: £1.60
Added: 20th April 2005

Birthday Girl - How do we know that sperm keeps the skin looking young??

Have you ever known a woman get wrinkly tonsils?

Comes with a free girls night out badge, stating: I'm no Ornithologist, but I do like a cockatoo!

Price: £1.60
Added: 20th April 2005

Wrap this card around your dick, shake vigorously, and Hey Presto!?

A Birthday Wank!

Comes with FREE badge - featuring full colour photo - Pussies are like kebabs? You only want to eat one when you're pissed

Price: £1.60
Added: 7th July 2003

'Thought you'd like this babe - she breeds chickens.....'

The message inside reads, '...ok - that's not strictly true - but she certainly raises COCKS! HAPPY BIRTHDAY!'

Badge included, 'What have BEER and BOOBS got in common? Men like More than they can HANDLE!'

Price: £1.60
Added: 7th July 2003

'Why are women better than drugs?...'

The message inside reads, '...You can use the same crack again and again! HAPPY BIRTHDAY!'

Badge included, 'What have BEER and BOOBS got in common? Men like More than they can HANDLE!'

Price: £1.60
Added: 7th July 2003

'What's the difference between a DICK... and a CRACKER?...'

The message inside reads, '...a cracker tastes BETTER with cheese on it!'

Badge included, 'Gagging for a Shagging'

Price: £1.60
Added: 7th July 2003

'Picked this card because I know you like your men to be caring and intelligent...'

The message inside reads, '...just as long as they've got a BIG COCK and a LOVELY ARSE! HAPPY BIRTHDAY'

Badge included, 'Gagging for a Shagging'

Price: £1.60
Added: 7th July 2003

'Where do the horniest women come from?...'

The message inside reads, '...their FANNIES, stupid! HAPPY BIRTHDAY!'

Badge included, 'Women are like condoms - they spend too much time in your wallet and not enough time on your KNOB!'

Price: £1.60
Added: 7th July 2003

'Did you know that the average vagina is 8 inches deep... While the average DICK is 6 inches long?...'

The message inside reads, '...this means there's about 15,000 miles of spare PUSSY knocking about somewhere! HAPPY BIRTHDAY!'

Badge included, 'Women are like condoms - they spend too much time in your wallet and not enough time on your KNOB!'

Price: £1.60
Added: 7th July 2003

'Inside-a discreet door hanger for your bedroom to make sure you're not disturbed when you're having sex tonight!...'

The message inside reads, 'Having a Giant WANK Do Not Disturb! HAPPY BIRTHDAY!'

Badge included, 'Good News for Viagra users... You can now get it over the counter (If you take enough!)'

Price: £1.60
Added: 7th July 2003

'That's some root you've got there sir!'

The message inside reads, 'Happy Birthday!'

Badge included, 'Good News for Viagra users... You can now get it over the counter (If you take enough!)